I am Happy Here

This morning I took my coffee cup and my Bible out to the deck and realized once again how much I love this little place of ours. My wife Heather and I and our children live on this unimpressive 6 acres in a very small, frame house, not even 1,000 square feet until we closed in the back porch to create another room. We have an old barn made of oak with a rusty tin roof that houses the chicken coop, covers my lawn tractor and four-wheeler and keeps the feed dry.

It appraises now for even less than we paid for it because of the economy. But it would cost someone a great deal more than its appraised value to get me to consider parting with this place. Too much life has happened here. And too much death. All my children have called this place “Home”. We first moved here when Jacob was a little fella, and Allie was kicking her mother in the ribs from the inside.

Jacob died here. We moved away. It hurt too much to stay where every tree and every floor board were reminders of what we had lost. But when the pain had subsided enough, we moved back. We moved back because those same trees and floor boards were reminders. Only now the reminders called up more medicinal memories than malignant ones. We could remember happy smiles and riotous laughter and joyous war whoops. We could remember the triumphant spirit of our son and the infectious energy of our little girl. We could remember the hugs and kisses and bonfires and porch swings in the evening. What should have destroyed this place for us only infused it with the riches of memory.

Now when I have my coffee and read my Bible on that deck looking out past the barn to the pasture I feel the richness of tangible memory. The barn’s not just a barn and the chickens are not just chickens. The old hulk of the apple tree’s trunk and the rusty tin of the barn roof are more than physical. They make this place spiritual. They conjure up memories that minister to my soul. They make me pause and ponder the works of God in my life. They are Ebenezer stones to remind me of the blessings that come from both the triumphs and tragedies of this life.

I remember and I am happy here.