Under God's Hammer

Just tonight Heather dug out an old file folder that contained a treasure trove of my work, much of it from the years we battled cancer with our son Jacob. Being a teacher and coach at Evangelical Christian School made our agony an all too public thing at times, and this poem captures some of that sentiment. I think it probably reflects what many people feel when they too find themselves powerless in their situations. The last line was inspired by Peter's response to Jesus when many of his disciples abandoned Him. My response was ultimately the same... though hard to come by, " Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life." (John 6:68).

Under God’s Hammer

You have hammered me O Lord,

You have taken my life and pounded it thin---

Thin to the point of translucence

So thin that all may see my life laid raw and bare,

Exposed to the unnumbered host gathered ‘bout

To watch the hammer fall and smash and beat

From my very bones any sway I would have over me and mine.

You beat till my grip grew weak and I cast all on you.

Your hammer beat smooth the wrinkles and undulations I had wrought,

The craft of my hands, the plan for my life.

Your white hot fire consumed the dross of my self-reliance,

Consumed my strength, and brought froth Thine when mine at last was spent.

Your anvil is indeed terrible O Lord.

No man longs for its face.

Yet, ‘tis there that your smith-craft is plied.

‘tis there you batter to mend.

But, Lord, for a spell give thy hammer rest.

Stay the hand that sends the test,

And bless again the one thought cursed.

Cool thy fire for yet a while,

And take me from thy anvil’s face.

Yet, you are Lord--- though hammer in hand---

To whom shall I turn?